I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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