Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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