I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I'm too high and old for this...
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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