Your tits are I can't wait for
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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