If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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