I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize