haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Randomize
