Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
