So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
These tits shall not be calmed
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
