my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
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