She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
