Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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