Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
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