Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize