Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
