Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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