Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize