I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
