biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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