So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize