Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
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