Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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