she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
