dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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