i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
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