What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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