best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
