Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
he fucked my hip out of place.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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