it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
