I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize