We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.