Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
