in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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