David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
