News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
