Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
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