I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I should be sponsored by Trojan
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
