very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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