the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Randomize
