I accidentally burped into my bong.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
