So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
