So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
