No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Randomize
