Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize