Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize