Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Randomize
