Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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