You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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