yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Randomize
