i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize