Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
