Texts From Last Night

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  (586): View more from Michigan

  I need a shot of tequila, and quick death

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  (586): I need a shot of tequila, and quick death http://tfl.nu/qciv
  Replies (5) Good night (703) Bad night (888)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept

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  (773): I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept http://tfl.nu/49pe
  Replies (10) Good night (611) Bad night (1873)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  Welp...herpes.

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  (614): Welp...herpes. http://tfl.nu/xa8l
  Replies (28) Good night (639) Bad night (6232)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love

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  (214): She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love http://tfl.nu/tjul
  Replies (51) Good night (20043) Bad night (917)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it

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  (604): Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it http://tfl.nu/jw4z
  Replies (13) Good night (936) Bad night (4072)
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?

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  (479): Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one? http://tfl.nu/0w3a
  Replies (55) Good night (1007) Bad night (6639)
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  (857): View more from Massachusetts

  You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.

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  (857): You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks. http://tfl.nu/io5n
  Replies (10) Good night (3362) Bad night (876)
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time

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  (719): She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time http://tfl.nu/gadq
  Replies (21) Good night (6817) Bad night (1372)
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  (386): View more from Florida

  I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.

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  (386): I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green. http://tfl.nu/e68o
  Replies (13) Good night (4273) Bad night (944)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits

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  (412): its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits http://tfl.nu/0tzr
  Replies (6) Good night (801) Bad night (1444)
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  (478): View more from Georgia

  Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend

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  (478): Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend http://tfl.nu/itrv
  Replies (4) Good night (1131) Bad night (586)
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  (949): View more from California

  he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.

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  (949): he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless. http://tfl.nu/m9y7
  Replies (1) Good night (504) Bad night (806)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.

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  (908): I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years. http://tfl.nu/293u
  Replies (4) Good night (423) Bad night (899)
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  (916): View more from California

  Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.

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  (916): Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though. http://tfl.nu/db3p
  Replies (15) Good night (403) Bad night (1592)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?

  (340): View more from US Virgin Islands

  It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions

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  (908): Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b? (340): It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions http://tfl.nu/22dq
  Replies (2) Good night (877) Bad night (357)

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